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Thursday 17 January 2013

Break work into small bits - Ask Our Counsellor Q&A Column


[The following column answered by me appeared in the Deccan Herald Education supplement dt. Jan 17, 2013]

Dear Madam,
I am a first year MBBS student. My problem is that I am not able to concentrate on studies. Earlier, I used to study well, but now, I seem to have lost my momentum. Kindly help me.

Nusrat Jahan

Dear Nusrat

You will need to tell me a little more about what you are feeling for me to really be able to help you. Why have you lost your momentum? Are you not interested in the subject any more? If this is the case, maybe it is too soon into the course for you to decide that, and you should take a call after some more time if this is something you want to continue with or not. Are you getting anxious about the results, or overwhelmed by the amount of work ahead? If you are getting anxious about the results, you need to focus on the learning and not worry about the marks.

Consider the worst possible outcome if you do not do as well as you would like, and assess whether it is something you can live with. In all probability, if you really think about it, it will be. If you are getting overwhelmed by the amount of work, break it up into small achievable goals, and remember to take stock of each goal as you achieve it, and celebrate its completion.

Sometimes on a tough journey, we need to keep looking back to see how far we have come, rather than look ahead and worry about how far we have to go. Another reason for you to lose momentum could be distractions from friends and romantic relationships. Like I said, I can’t really help you till I know the reason, but hopefully I have given you some pointers.

All the best

Dear Madam,

I am a class 12 CBSE student. I aspire to join IIT and now about 2 months are left for JEE mains. I have scored close to 70% in our school confidence exams and am very depressed because this is very low compared to my usual 90%. My JEE preparation seems to be bringing own my boards preparation. So, now I am confused whether to concentrate on JEE preparations or boards. Please help.

Manjit

Dear Manjit

You have to aspire to really ‘learn’ what you are studying so that the knowledge stays with you. I cannot say which one you should focus on at the cost of the other. I think both have their own place. But if you want to do engineering, it is good to aspire to do it from the IITs, but it does not mean that if you do not get into IIT, you are a failure.

There are so many other good colleges that you can join. In fact, I know of several hiring managers who prefer engineers from the second rung of colleges because they believe they have more hunger for learning on the job and do not come in with an attitude. So aim for the best, but remember, that that is not the only option. Sometimes, keeping that in perspective, and realizing that that is not the only open door for you to pursue reduces and the stress and anxiety assoicated with the results.

Also, remember, the marks you get, either in the Boards, or in JEE, are no guarantor or success in life. Success in life depends on several other things - your self-esteeem, your belief in your self and your abilities, your ability to communicate, you ability to work in a team and lead a team, your ability to problem solve and think out of the box, etc. etc. Yes, exams and marks are important, but the only role they play is to open some doors. If you don’t have them, you can always try opening other doors. Hope that helps.

Sunday 13 January 2013

Take time off to prepare - Ask Our Counsellor Q&A Column

[The following questions answered by me appeared in the Deccan Herald Education supplement of January 10, 2013. However, interestingly, due to editorial goof-ups they went under another person's name!! It's never happened to me before. Hope it doesn't happen again. However, since the content is mine I am going ahead and reproducing it here.]

Take time off to prepare

Jan 10, 2013
Dear Madam
I am a 21-year old graduate from Mysore, and I completed my Bachelors in Business Administration (BBA) in June 2012. Instead of applying for MBA immediately, I chose to take a year off and concentrate on studying for various management exams (CAT, XAT, MAT, etc.). I was actually aiming for an admission into one of the IIMs, so I prepared for CAT-2012, and took it in the month of October 2012. Right now, it is December, and I am preparing for XAT, which is to be held on January 6, 2013.

The thing that is troubling me is that I do not have any work experience to my credit. All I had planned to do was prepare for management exams. And even though I put all my efforts towards preparing for CAT from July-Oct 2012, the actual test was not as good as I had hoped. I managed to do just about okay. And not only this, I have also been told by my parents that they will not be able to afford admissions into the IIMs, as my family is somewhat tight regarding finances.

Hearing this, I became totally depressed, thinking that all my efforts were in vain. And my parents are adamant that I continue my education in Mysore, so that they can be with me and save on money as well. I am totally against it. I do not want to compromise on the matter of my Masters degree in any way, since my BBA days were not all that enriching and college was not exactly a “learning” experience”. I have no expectations from Mysore at all- My mother is behind me to find a job so that I can assist my family. Even I want to- but in a place like Mysore, I really don’t know how to go about it, and I don’t even have any expectations of finding a decent job here.

Please advise. I have a very bad feeling, as if I’ve hit a dead end.

Anonymous.

Dear Anonymous

It is okay to take some time off to prepare for exams. It is not mandatory that you have work experience right at the start. If you have put in your best effort, and you get admission for MBA, as per your wishes, then you don’t need to worry on account of the lack of work experience.

However, if you don’t get admission, again all is not lost. You can always gain some work experience, and then try again after a couple of years. In any case you can benefit a lot more from a management degree when you have the practical experience of the workplace. So if you don’t get admission, you can choose to view it as a failure and feel dejected and depressed. Or you can choose to view it as an opportunity to gain some work experience, and try later.

Secondly, if your family is not able to support you financially for further studies, you can always look at the possibility of taking a bank loan to do this. I believe there are education loans available these days, though I have to admit I do not have too many details on this. You don’t need to see this as a dead end.

You need to be able to decide for yourself what you would like out of your life. Understandably, your family would like to have you close to them. You need to be able to formulate your plans, and communicate them to your family. Remember, your needs and aspirations will be different from those of your family, and it is okay for you to chase your own dreams.

Understandably opportunities in Mysore will be limited compared to what they would be if you are willing to move out. In the process if you are able to carry your family along with your decision, you will be some much richer for it. This will require you to be able to communicate your goals and motivations to them, and address their insecurities to the best you can.

Dear Madam

I’m in X class. With hardly 3 months left for my Board exams, I’m still not addicted to books. When I open my books, I read for some time (10 to 15 minutes). After that my mind starts diverting to some other topic. I don’t know how to keep all these out and concentrate on my studies. I’m worried that if I don’t do well in the Boards, I won’t get into a good colleges. Please help me out to prepare well for exams.

Avinash

Dear Avinash

Why do you need to study? You need to answer that question for yourself and find your true motivation. If your motivation is to get good marks, to make your parents happy, to get admission into a good college, or to impress everyone, then you need to think again. Those may be short-term motivations but cannot be an end in themselves. What is your end goal and what are you working towards? If the end goal is exciting enough, you will feel motivated to work towards it. Remember, you need to do it for yourself, not for anyone else. You will be the biggest beneficiary of the effort you put in now.